We are definitely getting soft.
Yes America, we are. In a recent speech by President Obama, he mentioned that America is getting soft, on the economic and jobs markets, we are seeing more and more people wanting (demanding) that the government hand over money and create jobs for us. I am even seeing those Occupy (where ever) people asking that someone else pay for student loans, except the student.
But let’s get into a bigger picture. OK?
Long, long ago in a country not so far away, we had sporting events called Special Olympics. In these events we had children/adults of all ages, retarded mentally, (I know, someone is yelling “Mentally challenged or mentally handicapped”. I can hear them from here. Remember I am not PC) competing in sporting events and every one of those people are getting an award for their effort. That’s great! Given that they need as much help as we can to get them to be somewhat functional in society.
Here is my problem…It’s 2011. In my day (born 1957) we played games, sometimes we lost, we took test and sometimes we failed. Sometimes we tried out for baseball or football teams and didn’t even make the team. Ladies and Gentlemen, failure was an option and still is. When your child tries out for something, cheerleader, football or whatever, they should not always get on the team.
No matter how many times you throw a ball at some kids, there may be some that cannot catch the damn thing. That’s just the way it is. And if the kid cannot catch a ball then he has no place on the team. And if playing sports is not about winning, it should at least be about looking like you have some idea about how to play. It doesn’t make you a bad person to fail at anything, it just means that you either try again (HARDER) or move on to something else.
This logic can be passed on to virtually all areas of life. Those of us from the 50’s and 60’s remember full well, being told over and over, “life’s not fair”. Well it is not fair and by creating an atmosphere in our children’s minds that it is, only adds to the dilemma our children will face in the future.
When we coddle and protect our children from every facet of life, every pain and heartache life throws at them, we are setting them up for ever greater pains. At some point in our lives and those of our children we must cut the strings and our children will be adults, on their own and facing a world that isn’t quite as forgiving as we were. When they go to job interviews and are face with competing for a position head to head with another candidate, believe me, the employer does not grade on a curve to make sure every applicant looks equal.
And when employed there is alway another person that wants the job you are doing. Life is not fair…. get used to it.
Teach your children to fight. Mentally and physically. We are seeing more and more exposure of the “Bully” running the schools. (They try to run the workplace too) The problem is, that so many people have taken to a view of non-violence, that self-defense is now no longer an option. Talking will only get you so far. Bullies push, shove, hit, beat and humiliate. And somethings just can’t be talked to. Bullies are not new. What is striking me is that how we deal with them is the new thing.
Let me tell you something… A good solid hit, with a closed, tight fist and straight wrist to the forehead will do a lot more to stop a bully than any Ph.D. Of course that doesn’t mean to pop every person that talks to you about something you don’t agree with. But when face with getting beat up and either analyzing the personality of the attacker or defending yourself from them, pick your own option. No matter what any one says, no one has been talked to death. And your child is not likely to talk a real bully into submission.
1. You don’t always win
2. You don’t always lose
3. You are not good at everything
4. Everyone is great at something
5. LIFE IS NEVER FAIR
Take on the world, be prepared for failure, expect success and hope to break even. When you get out of bed in the morning, count yourself blessed… the alternative sucks. Our children should grow up in a world, knowing that things are hard sometimes and that everything is not handed to them. We as adults, should be teaching our children not only how to succeed, but how to fail.
Have a great day America